Every civ in one sentence

[_RDX_]

Well before leaving, I wanted post a few things. Feel free to give an opinion whether you like it or not. Here you go....describing every civ in one sentence:

Aztecs:
Komache, Ku, Oak..... I'm in your base you dumbfuck

British:
Bruh, Economy is my middle name but still i don't know how the fuck i don't have skirms.

Chinese:
According to the history, i invented the gunpowder but according to aoe 3, i have to spend fucking 2200 resources to access it.

Dutch:
I'm rich af, I own the banks dawg, i have enough money to produce a hollywood film but no i don't care.

French:
j'ai tout, idiots... I am'eh the easy civ to plai'eh.

Germans:
Help! I can't breathe, This is a no TP map and i forgot to build a house

Indians:
Our villies are made of wood but we rather don't care about that, we're a bit slow...... Boom! sepoys in your base.

Iroquois:
Ah, I exist.

Japanese:
Well wait..wait for a moment..hold on...Haha, gotcha bitch.... no more hunts, Here, taste some of my yumibows, This is called laming, boi!

Ottomans:
*coughs* did someone say laming?

Portuguese:
Bruh, I can have 2 tcs in colonial but still I don't know how the fuck i don't have any villie shipments.

Russians:
I may or may not win the game but i'm sure that i can win the 'Most units lost' award all the time.

Sioux:
I'm a legit laming civ, They even gave me a buff in EP but have to say, My axe riders are in love with your villagers, i think.....um wait, that's bad.

Spain:
Hasta La Vista baby, I got a secret XP mod.

[deleted_user0]

Well before leaving, I wanted post a few things. Feel free to give an opinion whether you like it or not. Here you go....describing every civ in one sentence:

Aztecs:
me virgin me hate night clubs me make disco in age of empires

British:
me gua me make 2 manors in 30 mins

Chinese:
me communist me spawn one billion free units

Dutch:
me make 5 banks me go tc me camp there for 15 mins

French:
me standard skirm goon bot me boring

Germans:
me mass 100 pop in 9 mins me cry about uhlans

Indians:
True alpha civ with jacked sepoys.

Iroquois:
Me crackshot 100 units me find some autistic renegados

Japanese:
me make walls me go industrial me make 100 attack yumis

Ottomans:
me abus

Portuguese:
me ship cm me camp in tc me go industrial

Russians:
me make ruskets oh fuck 1000 ruskets died to 5 cuir

Sioux:
me spam br me run around me lamer

Spain:
me hazza me autism

[_RDX_]

Well, i'll delete my post if ya want.

[ShinkuroYukinari]

Here's mine cause why not

Aztecs:
Either you resign in Age 3 or you worship ERK

British:
Can both chop and hunt to produce settlers, still manages to screw up

Chinese:
Screws up build order, still wins cause of Old Han Reform

Dutch:
Heard you liked 150 Ruyters in your base

French:
Either you lame Cuirassiers or you punish idiots who think you will lame

Germans:
Where's my pop space FFS!

Indians:
The one civ with Elephants, and they suck.

Iroquois:
Did someone say "5 Minute rush"?

Japanese:
Ashis with a side of Ashis

Ottomans:
Only knows how to Jan+Abus rush, probably Turkish

Portuguese:
Has best Dragoons in game and 2 TCs in Age 2, still manages to suck hard

Russians:
Screws up build order, still throws 100 Strelets at 9 minutes

Sioux:
Bows and Bow accessories

Spain:
Tfw your Royal Guard is a freaking Pikeman

[007Salt]

Based on all my experience playing with many people. Everyone has come to this very conclusion.

Aztecs:
Lame.

British:
Lame.

Chinese:
Lame.

Dutch:
Lame.

French:
Lame.

Germans:
Lame.

Indians:
Lame.

Iroquois:
Lame.

Japanese:
Lame.

Ottomans:
Lame.

Portuguese:
Lame.

Russians:
Lame.

Sioux:
Lame.

Spain:
Lame.