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United States of America CurassierAndCurassier
ESOC Media Team
Posts: 165
ESO: Montcalm17
Location: San Francisco

22 Oct 2017, 20:24


Struggling to drum up the courage to actually sign up for the Autumn Tournament? Have you had the sign up tab open but untouched for a week now like me? Trying to find a civ that will give stronger players the fits? Allow me to present the Sioux for your consideration.

Ironically, in the finals of last month's Warchiefs Classic the Warchief civs lost every matchup (that wasn’t a mirror) except for one. In game 4 Aizamk, hacker of cows, tamer of bears, rode the Sioux to a decisive victory over Diarouga’s Russians to take a commanding 3-1 lead in the series. This is the story of how he did it.


On the High Plains, a band of Sioux villagers begin their hunting season after a long journey to find the Bison herds. But they are not alone. To the North, an intrepid Russian colony, a long way away from the Siberian tundra. Soon the war drums sound. It is Aizamk that answers.

Aizamk uses his explorer’s speed to burst around the map in search of the best treasures. He stumbles across 140 food and attacks the guardian wolves, but apparently misses the outlaw rider hiding in the woods. It gets off a number of pot shots on Aizamk’s explorer, taking his health down far more than he would have liked, before he uses his convert ability on him.

“Die, Injin. Get off my territory you damned... hey, you’re pretty cool man let me join ya.” - Outlaw Rider, apparently

Darting off to the bottom of the map, Aizamk constructs a trading post while Diarouga picks up some coin treasures and rushes to build a commanding blockhouse on Aizamk’s side of the map with three villagers. It cuts Aizamk off from the trading post nearest his base, as well as one of his future hunts. A defensive war hut goes up in the Siooux base.

The Sioux certainly take a while to go through its hunts, with the bison they can ship from home and upon age ups. But as Russia is more than happy to starve an opponent out. Diarouga begins construction on a second blockhouse, right next to the first. If left unchecked, it will slowly squeeze the life out of Aizamk’s colony, like a python.

Aizamk Steps on Snek

Flitting back across the map, Aizamk cheekily picks up a 280 XP treasure by cleverly making use of his explorer’s splash damage. It will give him his next shipment almost immediately after his second one arrives. 4 Axe Riders storm through the plains, straight for the unfinished blockhouse. It goes down in a hurry. Diarouga, unfazed, goes right back to constructing it once the Sioux cavalry leave.

But Aizamk’s not done yet.

He returns with something of a mini-timing push. 7 War Clubs arrive from the home city, joining 5 trained ones as well as the Axe Riders. They overwhelm the small musketeer army Diarouga has made, destroy the unfinished blockhouse again and take down the already constructed one right after. A Trading Post goes down soon after, a lone, strangely hilarious teepee the only building left standing.

It is nothing short of a disaster of a start for Diarouga. Just six minutes into the game, he’s lost three blockhouses, a trading post, and control of the map. But he’s in the finals for a reason. He’s a great player and not one to panic over a rough start. He throws down defensive blockhouses and digs in for a longer match.

The Snek Bites Back

Happy with having taken out the immediate threat to his base and driven the Russians back home, Aizamk booms. He ships 5 villagers, then 700 coin, adds a second Trading Post, and begins his age up while harassing the Russian base with what remains of his early army. He does not notice the musketeer mass growing extremely fast. Barely two minutes after the disastrous fight at the blockhouses, he’s massed an army five times as large as Aizamk’s.

And it’s moving straight for his base.

Caught in the middle of aging, Aizamk can do little more than make sure his villagers run to the North to gather food unseen, and distract the Russians with his explorer. The War Hut goes down without a fight. Perhaps Diarouga doesn’t realize how much of an advantage he has. Maybe he senses a timing coming. (Aizamk’s certainly good at those.) After being caught being overly aggressive in game 3, perhaps Diarouga was just on edge. Whatever the reason, he withdraws despite being right on top of his opponent’s defenseless base.

The Final Blow

Soon after the retreat of the Russian army, Wakina Rifles and Rifle Riders arrive for Aizamk. I’m not sure if it would have been enough to repel the invasion entirely, but it certainly held the tech advantage. The skirm/goon combo on steroids is a nightmare for unupgraded Russian musketeers. He makes more and more rifle riders while Diarouga camps out in his base, trying to transition to Strelets and Cavalry Archers. Soon Aizamk goes full Yolo, and just slams his army into the Russian base, piecemeal.

So can we just take a second to appreciate the Rifle Rider? Just the sheer fact that it exists? That someone at Microsoft in 2006 sat down and brainstormed ideas for new units, and said “you know what sounds completely fair and balanced? A dragoon unit that also does triple damage to heavy infantry, six times damage to artillery, oh and I guess ships too while we’re at it?” And on top of all that, they fire like three times a second and can kite forever.

Despite the even numbers and the piecemeal way the Sioux army converges on the Russian town, the battle is laughably one-sided. The Russian army is mowed down in moments. The only thing sparing Diarouga outright defeat are his blockhouses, and the fact that someone stopped that Microsoft employee before he coded in a 63 siege damage on top of all the other absurd bonuses Rifle Riders get.

But it’s not like Diarouga still has a chance. Aizamk just hasn’t bothered to finish him off yet. Strelets/Cavalry Archers are the poor man’s Skirm/Goon, which are the poor man’s Wakina/Rifle Riders. His already struggling economy is dealt a massive blow by a sneaky raid Aizamk pulls off at a gold mine. A desperation effort to break out of his base is repulsed as Axe Riders and Dog Soldiers swarm the field, tipping the scales even further in Aizamk’s favor. Diarouga has no choice but to resign.

Now it is autumn and the drums of war beat again. The call echoes down the high plains and through the Painted Desert, through the Ozarks and over the frost-covered Hudson Bay. The Sioux await. Will you be the one to lead them to victory? Sign up for the Autumn Tournament and give them a shot! :biggrin:
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Netherlands MCJim
ESOC Media Team
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22 Oct 2017, 20:56

Some hype for our newest news post writer! Excellent post, many thanks ;)
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New Zealand JakeyBoyTH
Posts: 1761
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Location: New Zealand
Game: AoE Online

22 Oct 2017, 21:57

@Gendarme Nice to see you in the media team
Advanced Wonders suck

- Aizamk

Ugh Advanced Wonders suck

- Aizamk
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United States of America XeeleeFlower
ESOC Community & Media Team
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22 Oct 2017, 22:03

Awesome read! Thank you for the work you put into this. :flowers:
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Turkey breeze
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22 Oct 2017, 22:25

all hail esoc!
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Japan Aizamk
Posts: 828

23 Oct 2017, 04:03

we waz jus tryin' to make spanky happy
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China fei123456
Posts: 2446
ESO: fei123456
Location: Alderaan

23 Oct 2017, 04:26

that's just because EP sioux IMBALANCE
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No Flag ssaraf
Posts: 189
ESO: robinhood_xing

23 Oct 2017, 09:05

This write-up was soooo fuking good. Made me happy. Certainly was a Good Morning. :D

My favorite part from the post :
CurassierAndCurassier wrote:Strelets/Cavalry Archers are the poor man’s Skirm/Goon, which are the poor man’s Wakina/Rifle Riders. :biggrin:
Estonia jesus3
Posts: 1056

23 Oct 2017, 10:51

I'm def gonna give ppl the D after that
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United States of America XeeleeFlower
ESOC Community & Media Team
Donator 10
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23 Oct 2017, 11:17

jesus3 wrote:I'm def gonna give ppl the D after that

Oh Jesus!
My posts represent my views and may or may not represent the views of ESOC as a whole.

Whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

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Estonia jesus3
Posts: 1056

23 Oct 2017, 12:36

XeeleeFlower wrote:
jesus3 wrote:I'm def gonna give ppl the D after that

Oh Jesus!

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Norway iwillspankyou
Posts: 3370

23 Oct 2017, 15:26

:love: This is exacty how I remember that awsome fight. Nice one
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Denmark crjensen4
Donator 07
Posts: 166
ESO: crjensen4

24 Oct 2017, 07:20

Great write-up! Made me laugh and get excited about the coming tourney!
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France Kaiserklein
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Location: Paris
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03 Nov 2017, 09:44

Nice and funny write-up, but honeslty rifle riders are just shit in most cases... Shouldn't mislead people like that
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