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Right, should be legal
9
14%
Right, should be illegal
2
3%
Wrong, should be legal
12
18%
Wrong, should be illegal
14
21%
Garja should be spanked
29
44%
 
Total votes: 66

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No Flag lejend
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04 Apr 2018, 08:39

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Germany Lenari
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04 Apr 2018, 08:44

I think it depends on the personal understanding of Spanking a child. Hitting children or anybody else should be illegal, but I personally received a slap from my parents if i did something bad. Looking back i think it was for good, because i knew i was going to far.
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Armenia Sargsyan
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04 Apr 2018, 08:53

Nope.when i was a kid my father have never raised a hand on me.if i did something bad his look was enough for me to shit myself.i think you should control your child like that and never beat him
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No Flag Radix_Lecti
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04 Apr 2018, 08:54

of course bad. Weird to ask that in 2018 after so much behavioural research done on this very topic.
God... :ohmy:
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United States of America Vickyxxx5528
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04 Apr 2018, 08:58

I work with children everyday, I know children are getting more out of hand. I see it! Hitting a child is just wrong and quite frankly a lazy way to disciple your child. You can definitely use other methods to discipline your little one which are more effective. Parents are mostly to blame for their child’s behaviour with smacking him/her a easier alternative to other disciplinary methods.
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Germany japanesegeneral
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04 Apr 2018, 08:59

Radix_Lecti wrote:of course bad. Weird to ask that in 2018 after so much behavioural research done on this very topic.
God... :ohmy:


Discussing that makes a teacher as much pain as real spanking.
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Turkey HUMMAN
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04 Apr 2018, 09:04

Depends on the context basically. It is not black and white, relies on a spectrum. Generally it is ok, physical pain is nothing compared to physological one. Especially pulling ear, spanking ass is not painful but a way to communicate that you are authority. I would try not to use them on my children especially when young, because his/her behaviors reflect my attitude. But when in adoscelence in extreme behaviors i can respond with extreme.
Germany Lenari
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04 Apr 2018, 09:17

the msin reason why the kids nowdays show such disrespectful behavior is that they do not get educated by their parents. I'm often discussing the behavior of my generation with my grandfather. He's always saying that in his childhood, the kids were not disrespectful towards teacher, police etc. because they knew if the teacher would slap them in school. he would get another slap at home because he showed such disrespectful behavior....
I don't think hitting your Child's is the answer, but thinking that you could discuss with a child about his behavior is foolish.
No Flag umeu
Gendarme
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04 Apr 2018, 09:22

Radix_Lecti wrote:of course bad. Weird to ask that in 2018 after so much behavioural research done on this very topic.
God... :ohmy:


?!?!? The bible hasn't been changed in about 1500 years mate. Why does it matter that we are in year X. Typical, it's year X strawman. Lord, Jesus Christ and Maria Magdelena in a giant GB... If god says it's ok to hit kiddies, who are you to question him?
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United States of America XeeleeFlower
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04 Apr 2018, 09:24

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog ... te-is-over

I was spanked a lot as a child. Nearly every day. It wasn't a simple one hit. It was multiple hard hits. Sometimes I had bruises on my legs because the swing would hit my legs instead of my butt. It did nothing to quell my "rebellious" spirit. It simply made me hurt inside, and of course, physically as well. The last time I was supposed to get spanked, my dad said that from then on, I wouldn't get spanked, but that he would hit himself instead. He then proceeded to hit himself with the wooden paddle with the same intensity that he would use to hit me. I cried harder than I ever have and hurt more than I ever had. I was never spanked after that. I withdrew deeper into myself and simply became more creative in getting away with things.
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No Flag Radix_Lecti
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04 Apr 2018, 09:26

Ive witnessed corporal punishment in Korea as recent as 2012 and I think they still do it in rural areas. It does not help anyone not even the teacher I think. Poignant fact, just before leaving Korea a video of a female teacher throwing chairs at her students surfaced, finally opening up the discussion on corporal punishment there. When I started Teacher's college here in Europe we were all shown a video of a 19-year-old student in Rotterdam attacking a teacher as a warning of what we were going to be faced with in Holland. :biggrin: (I don't teach this level (MBO).

Before people take this up as a reason to: (fill in any generic, racist, one-liner here)
This video shows what bad class management is and can lead to. That poor man probably did his best and just made 1 wrong remark and isn't able to exude enough non-verbal control over inner-city students. It also shows why hitting children is always wrong. It condones aggression and creates more aggressive members of society. That student has not had the safe environment most of us have had the great fortune to experience. And especially in another culture and society he is faced with great difficulties adapting. In other words, here we see his father's behaviour and coping mechanisms copied word for word, step-by-step at play and his future children will act this way as well, and theirs and theirs etc. I can also state that he would have never acted this way if I had been his teacher. This is simply a case of a white teacher not being able to adapt to different cultures.

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No Flag Radix_Lecti
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04 Apr 2018, 09:30

XeeleeFlower wrote:Nearly every day.


You never did anything to deserve that and it is not your fault.

And perhaps I could also say that your father could not help himself either. I am just glad to see you will break this cycle that was burdened upon his shoulders.
No Flag umeu
Gendarme
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04 Apr 2018, 09:31

yup, children are generally, you get out of them what you put into them. It's silly how many people still think that hitting or pulling ears is good in any way. In most cases, even negative punishments like putting them in the corner, or shaming them doesn't work. You can definitely show authority other than hitting someone. In fact, if you have authority, you wouldn't even need to resort to hitting someone. It's a big show of weakness if you have to resort to violence to maintain order. This is true in a classroom, a home, or a country.
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Germany Lukas_L99
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04 Apr 2018, 09:33

Child abuse should be illegal obviously
No Flag umeu
Gendarme
Posts: 8609

04 Apr 2018, 09:33

Radix_Lecti wrote:This is simply a case of a white teacher not being able to adapt to different cultures.


I agreed with most of what you said, but it's not as simple as this to be honest. But I guess that's a different topic.
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Netherlands momuuu
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04 Apr 2018, 11:37

My dad would "hit" me in a way that didn't hurt but did have all the shock effect. He'd basically deflect his flat hand on the top of my head. It was quite technical but honestly appropriate in some situations. Never did hurt but it did make me realize my behaviour was very wrong.

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France kami_ryu
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04 Apr 2018, 12:00

I was whacked as a kid but nothing bad. I'm fine today. Other people have clearly had it worse
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Poland pecelot
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04 Apr 2018, 12:15

i w i l l s p a n k y o u
:flowers:
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United States of America Amsel_
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04 Apr 2018, 14:56

A lot of people will make a knee-jerk assumption that spanking is violence, and therefore, wrong; but I'm not so sure that's a good line of reasoning. Violence is necessary in a lot of situations. In fact the very notion of "civilization" depends upon a strong authority keeping people from acting like savages. Considering this I think the question shouldn't be whether or not spanking is ethical or not, but whether spanking is useful or not.

Before answering this question, I want to clarify that there is a difference between spanking and beating. Spanking is a parenting tool of dubious utility and ethical value; whereas beating is outright abusive and unproductive violence against someone. Essentially one is a form of discipline, and the other, abuse. So if spanking is a tool, what is it used for? Spanking is used to either punish a child or to display a parent's authority.

Punishing a child through spanking seems to be best used as a last resort. If a child refuses to share his toys then simply confiscate his toy. But if a child is grabbing a stick and beating his classmates across the face with it, then the appropriate method of punishment isn't as clear. On a societal basis, the only way to prevent people from being violent is to have them understand that violence is often met with violence. This is a situation where I think it can be useful. You are essentially using spanking as a substitute for violence from others; and once he grows he will already have some understanding of "an eye for an eye"; this can help him understand the societal backlash that would arise should he break any laws.

The other use is for establishing authority over children. If a child does not listen to anyone, if he follows no orders, then all else is in vain. Spanking is a good way of getting across a message stating "I am stronger than you. I am in charge of you. Obey me." without engaging in any traumatizing violence. The light application of force is very useful at instilling a hierarchy. A drill sergeant grabbing a private by the collar is a good example. There's also a historical example where when someone smacked their wife it was associated more with an attempt to maintain order in the household; rather than the contemporary conception which views it as domestic abuse committed by abusive alcoholic men. This isn't an endorsement of 'beating your wife.' Most men who do that these days actually fit the stereotype rather well. I'm just saying that it was historically effective, and is probably the closest comparison to spanking we have. If you can enforce men over women then you can certainly enforce adult over child.

I think the issue is that society has set up such a taboo around any form of strength or violence that only men of the lowest character engage in it. Even in cases where violence is used to defeat evil, there is a dislike of it. If someone brought a gun and shot a group of communists, or nazis, or muslims, or whatever group you hate the most; and that group was openly displaying their intention to overthrow the republic and instate their boogeyman world, the shooter would be considered the bad guy in the scenario. I find it so odd how modern society treats weakness and inaction as a virtue, even greater than destroying evil, or helping the good. But if I continue any further down this route we'll end up heavily off-topic, so lets just end it there.
No Flag Radix_Lecti
Dragoon
Posts: 412

04 Apr 2018, 15:07

You are wrong.
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France Kaiserklein
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04 Apr 2018, 15:28

It's quite simple. Hitting your kid means failing. It means you were not able to educate him without resorting to violence and pain. It's very unhealthy and despicable.
Think about it: a full-grown person would need to use his physical advantage over a young kid to get respected... instead of using reasoning and logic. How fucked up is that? It's lazy, it's wrong, it's useless. That's what I call bad parents.
It's the same as teachers who need to yell at the kids and give detentions, instead of having a natural authority and charism that gains the respect of the kids. We all had this kind of teacher, and we all know they suck.

Trying to inspire respect and discipline through fear is anyway not the way to go. It will never result in anything constructive, compared to an actual discussion.
Of course, it can happen that parents don't control themselves and actually hurt the kid unintentionally. It still sucks, but it's understandable. Can happen to anyone to lose control temporarily. But doing it on purpose, because it would be "good for the kid" or "life is hard" or whatever bullshit, is just plain stupid.
The line can be hard to draw. I remember my dad once grabbing me and holding me against the wall. It doesn't really hurt, but it's still violence (psychologically more than physically). Should it be allowed or not? Maybe, maybe not. At the end of the day, it won't prevent parents from doing it anyway.
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France Kaiserklein
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04 Apr 2018, 15:53

Too much stuff I disagree with in that post and I'm lazy to write another book, but about this specific part:
Amsel_ wrote:Spanking is used to either punish a child or to display a parent's authority.

This just couldn't be more wrong.
For one thing, punishing should be avoided as much as possible, since it's just not constructive. Of course sometimes it is needed, but there are better (non violent) ways of punishing than spanking.
For another, as I mentioned in my previous post, using spanking to display your authority is just purely failing. If you need to resort to hitting your kid (yes, it's hitting) to make yourself respected, well, you suck ass. An adult should have enough of a psychological advantage over a young kid to be able to show that he's right and should be listened to, without resorting to physical punishment. Unless that adult is actually too stupid or too wrong to be able to make his point, then yeah he's gonna hit the kid and fail the education.
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Australia WhatUNeed
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04 Apr 2018, 15:54

I thought spanking was some weird sexual fetish? Why would you do this to children that is pretty fucked up
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United States of America Amsel_
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04 Apr 2018, 16:15

@Kaiserklein I think I already covered the fact that it's a last resort punishment, so we're in agreement there. Although, I don't see the reasoning behind the use of force to display authority meaning you've failed. Young children's brains aren't developed enough to follow a lot of the reasoning behind adult behavior. Their id driven minds aren't something you should expect reason and social fluency from. I'm not saying not to try. You're correct in the sense that once you have to display authority, you're already lesser than someone who doesn't. It's just like how the best way to win a battle is not to fight at all. But if push comes to shove, and the child doesn't respect you then I'd say you have a duty to show your superiority. It would look pathetic for any man to fail to control a child. So, yes, having to use force to display superiority isn't ideal; however, failing to display authority at all is even less ideal, because it shows weakness on the part of the parent. Furthermore, if a child fails to learn respect while he is young then that is psychologically harming to him. It is hurting a children for the sake of odd pseudo-humanistic principles. That is why I think that, if no other solution is viable, spanking is an acceptable parenting tool. I apologize if I failed to emphasize that spanking isn't the first tool to be used.
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Italy Garja
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04 Apr 2018, 16:27

Eh, you can't always use reasonig and logic with kids. They sometimes just don't listen or simply can't even understand a reasoning. And quite frankly coming up with moral teaching every time while ideal it can also be too much of an effort or too time consuming. Spanking is a tool used by parents to make a point across without having to come up with explanations every time.
Surely educating with words is better. It gives the opporunity to the kid to understand things and get a better judgement. But parenting is not always about what's wrong and what's right.
Teachers should never touch kids. It's simply out of their task as educators. But ye, in general, punishment is not necessarily a bad tool for education.

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