Duck Tales Pt. 1
- Vinyanyérë
- Retired Contributor
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Duck Tales Pt. 1
Provided by the Mandarin Duck Squad Propaganda Team
âDamn, Iâm so bad!â Mitoe exclaimed, slamming a fist on the desk. The sounds of âLudus Perditusâ filled the room, as they had many times over the past week, and Mitoe sighed with exasperation. âI just canât win any of my games anymore. We donât have a chance of beating NWCâ.
âItâs because you only practice against Captains,â KINGofOsmane remarked with an expression halfway between amusement and disappointment. âIf youâd practiced with me at 6 a.m. every day like I asked, youâd be doing better right now.â Osmane sat next to Mitoe and in front of two computers. On the right screen, âVictory is yours!â lay atop a sea of green Jannisaries and dead teal villagers; on the left, Osmane was still AWPing scrubs in CSGO. Even one-handed, he was more than a match for Mitoe and his shattered confidence.
Not that Mitoe could get much practice anyway. Mandarin Duck Squad had been perpetually on the run in the last few weeks, hastily setting up practice encampments and trying to squeeze as many games in as possible before NWC discovered their location. Their newest practice houshe was in the ruins of Seoul, South Korea, a city long since destroyed in the fierce conflict between the two teams.
âLads, Iâve got bad news,â duck said, waddling into the room. âThe NWC AI network has completed its conquest of Spain. Our last resistance holdouts were wiped out. Nobody can get in contact with PĂ©rez. Judicator Mr_Bramboy has awarded the 5-0 to NWC.â
âI-Impossible,â said minimoult21. minimoult was the newest recruit to MDS. Though untested, he had proven himself a valuable asset to the MDS High Command, and had pulled off a miraculous 5-0 against Stanley_Winston earlier in the week. Even so, the hours of grueling practice had taken their toll, and minimoult was as bleary-eyed and haggard as Mitoe. âWe havenât lost all of China yet. Canât we send wookl to play KingOwnage instead?â
âWho?â asked Osmane.
duck shook his bill. âThe Administratorsâ word is final.â
A new voice filled the room. âInteresting. That puts the score for the week at 10-10. Our only pathway to the playoffs now is if Mitoe defeats diarouga 5-0. By my calculations, at Mitoeâs current level of performance, he is expected to go 1-4. That will not be enough to win.â
The disembodied voice was Sircallenâs. Callen had merged his consciousness with AI to enhance his analytical powers. Though he lacked physical form, he had become the most powerful Analyst in the world, capable of making builds and predicting results far beyond what mere humans could comprehend. For all of this, however, he was no match for the capacity of the NWC Model AI, and had been fighting losing battles with it across the globe.
âAstute observations, Callen. This is why youâre the premier EPL Analyst,â minimoult said. âI fear it may be time to give it up. We had a good run, but NWC is just too strong. Jerimuno was right, in the end.â
Jerimuno had disappeared after he dropped his first game against Ezad. In his absence, the Administrators awarded the other four games to Ezad as well.
âWe canât give up yet.â replied duck. âWe cannot allow the sacrifices of our comrades be for naught. Oliveza, TLS, Somppu - itâs our duty to avenge them! They gave themselves up so that we might take NWC down -â
There was a knock.
Everyone turned towards the door, tensed. Had NWC found them so soon?
Mitoe composed himself and moved towards the door. If this was to be the end, he would face the end as the champion MDS needed.
But when he opened the door, he did not find the end. He found the person he least expected.
It was GiveUAnxiety.
âDamn, Iâm so bad!â Mitoe exclaimed, slamming a fist on the desk. The sounds of âLudus Perditusâ filled the room, as they had many times over the past week, and Mitoe sighed with exasperation. âI just canât win any of my games anymore. We donât have a chance of beating NWCâ.
âItâs because you only practice against Captains,â KINGofOsmane remarked with an expression halfway between amusement and disappointment. âIf youâd practiced with me at 6 a.m. every day like I asked, youâd be doing better right now.â Osmane sat next to Mitoe and in front of two computers. On the right screen, âVictory is yours!â lay atop a sea of green Jannisaries and dead teal villagers; on the left, Osmane was still AWPing scrubs in CSGO. Even one-handed, he was more than a match for Mitoe and his shattered confidence.
Not that Mitoe could get much practice anyway. Mandarin Duck Squad had been perpetually on the run in the last few weeks, hastily setting up practice encampments and trying to squeeze as many games in as possible before NWC discovered their location. Their newest practice houshe was in the ruins of Seoul, South Korea, a city long since destroyed in the fierce conflict between the two teams.
âLads, Iâve got bad news,â duck said, waddling into the room. âThe NWC AI network has completed its conquest of Spain. Our last resistance holdouts were wiped out. Nobody can get in contact with PĂ©rez. Judicator Mr_Bramboy has awarded the 5-0 to NWC.â
âI-Impossible,â said minimoult21. minimoult was the newest recruit to MDS. Though untested, he had proven himself a valuable asset to the MDS High Command, and had pulled off a miraculous 5-0 against Stanley_Winston earlier in the week. Even so, the hours of grueling practice had taken their toll, and minimoult was as bleary-eyed and haggard as Mitoe. âWe havenât lost all of China yet. Canât we send wookl to play KingOwnage instead?â
âWho?â asked Osmane.
duck shook his bill. âThe Administratorsâ word is final.â
A new voice filled the room. âInteresting. That puts the score for the week at 10-10. Our only pathway to the playoffs now is if Mitoe defeats diarouga 5-0. By my calculations, at Mitoeâs current level of performance, he is expected to go 1-4. That will not be enough to win.â
The disembodied voice was Sircallenâs. Callen had merged his consciousness with AI to enhance his analytical powers. Though he lacked physical form, he had become the most powerful Analyst in the world, capable of making builds and predicting results far beyond what mere humans could comprehend. For all of this, however, he was no match for the capacity of the NWC Model AI, and had been fighting losing battles with it across the globe.
âAstute observations, Callen. This is why youâre the premier EPL Analyst,â minimoult said. âI fear it may be time to give it up. We had a good run, but NWC is just too strong. Jerimuno was right, in the end.â
Jerimuno had disappeared after he dropped his first game against Ezad. In his absence, the Administrators awarded the other four games to Ezad as well.
âWe canât give up yet.â replied duck. âWe cannot allow the sacrifices of our comrades be for naught. Oliveza, TLS, Somppu - itâs our duty to avenge them! They gave themselves up so that we might take NWC down -â
There was a knock.
Everyone turned towards the door, tensed. Had NWC found them so soon?
Mitoe composed himself and moved towards the door. If this was to be the end, he would face the end as the champion MDS needed.
But when he opened the door, he did not find the end. He found the person he least expected.
It was GiveUAnxiety.
duck
imo
imo
- princeofcarthage
- Retired Contributor
- Posts: 8861
- Joined: Aug 28, 2015
- Location: Milky Way!
Re: Duck Tales Pt. 1
I was tricked, I waited for a story about the cartoon
Correlation doesn't mean causation.
http://www.tylervigen.com/spurious-correlations
"mr.brookg go buy jeans and goto the club with somppuli" - Princeofkabul, July 2018
http://www.tylervigen.com/spurious-correlations
"mr.brookg go buy jeans and goto the club with somppuli" - Princeofkabul, July 2018
- KINGofOsmane
- Pro Player
- Posts: 3096
- Joined: Feb 24, 2015
- ESO: KINGofOsmane
- Location: Walling Town
Re: Duck Tales Pt. 1
EDIT:
Mitoe gave up and now practises with me almost everyday at 6am his time xd
Mitoe gave up and now practises with me almost everyday at 6am his time xd
"Losing to Callen was the worst night of my life" Gibthedurrty 2019
"If hazza can get pr42 with team i can get pr50 with 1v1" Gibthedurrty 2018
"If hazza can get pr42 with team i can get pr50 with 1v1" Gibthedurrty 2018
Tete cs:go experienceLecastete wrote: Dude i hate this game. I am bad and i also dont have luck
Re: Duck Tales Pt. 1
My small brain cannot comprehend the implications of that cliffhanger
- Imperial Noob
- Lancer
- Posts: 958
- Joined: Feb 29, 2016
- Location: Well hello DEre
Re: Duck Tales Pt. 1
It would be much funnier if it ended with "It was Jesus".
Good story tho, recommended
Good story tho, recommended
-
- Ninja
- Posts: 14364
- Joined: Mar 26, 2015
Re: Duck Tales Pt. 1
esocMDS esocMDS esocMDS
- Vinyanyérë
- Retired Contributor
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- Joined: Aug 22, 2016
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Re: Duck Tales Pt. 1
Pt. 2
âGiveUAnxiety...You came back,â Mitoe stammered, equal parts shocked and delighted.
âNo,â GUA replied, resting a hand on his old friendâs shoulder. âI never left.â
Osmane eyed the newcomer with suspicion. âThe Ninjas were never ones to be trusted. How do we know heâs not in league with NWC?â
minimoult added, âLetâs not forget wooklâs 1-4 loss to GUA. Even if he isnât an NWC spy, thereâs no doubt heâs been working with the Administrators.â
Osmane looked visibly confused at minimoultâs comment but nodded in agreement nonetheless.
âGUA saved the Mandarin Duck Squad before. In our darkest hour, it was he who kept us afloat during the First League. Without GUA, MDS would not be around. Letâs hear what he has to say,â duck said, lifting a wing to calm the raised voices.
GUA spoke next. âNot all of Japan is under the NWC AIâs control. From a hidden monastery, Aizamk and the other Nilla Ninjas have coordinated a resistance movement that threatens to undermine NWCâs grasp of the entire country. As for me, I have been sent to aid the MDS effort directly.â
âFinally, a real practice partner!â KINGofOsmane laughed.
âWell, itâs a good sentiment, but Iâve got bad news. I ran the numbers, and even with GUA helping Mitoe practice, given the short time until the next match, my analysis gives Mitoeâs expected result at 3-2, maybe 4-1 if we get lucky. Itâs still not going to be enough,â Callen said. Even as a hybrid of human and AI, the disappointment in Callenâs robotic voice was palpable.
âMaybe so,â GUA smiled. âBut Mitoe wonât need to play. Iâll defeat diarouga myself.â
No sooner had GUA finished speaking than alarms sounds blared throughout the team houshe.
âAlert,â Callen said. âAdministrators detected in the area. Enforcer BrookG seems to have detected GUAâs claim that he would play in Mitoeâs place. We have twelve seconds to evacuate.â
âI knew it!â minimoult yelled. âThis was a setup. GUA is working for the Admin-â
Before he could finish his sentence, the roof of the team houshe was ripped off, and everyone looked up to see BrookG, High Enforcer of the Administrators, levitating above them. BrookG needed no weapon save one - his Rule Book, the words from which his utterance could destroy the playoff dreams of any team. As he opened the Rule Book, it glowed a bright gold, as if aware of the valiant fury that it would soon unleash.
âMANDARIN DUCK SQUAD,â BrookG thundered, his voice carrying throughout every crevice of the ruins of Seoul. âYOU ARE FOUND TO BE IN VIOLATION OF RULE 48.52: ONLY THE CHAMPION OR PLAYERS DRAFTED BY YOUR TEAM THROUGH THE AUCTION OR APPROVED TRADES MAY PLAY FOR YOUR TEAM. YOU ARE ADDITIONALLY FOUND TO BE IN VIOLATION OF RULE 115.35: AFTER PAIRINGS ARE FINALIZED, YOU MAY NOT SUBSTITUTE PLAYERS. YOUR PUNISHMENT IS IMMEDIATE DISQUALIFICATION FROM THE LEAGUE. SURRENDER NOW, OR YOU WILL RECEIVE AN ADDITIONAL SIX MONTH BANâ
Players, managers, champions, and analysts alike quailed at the sight of the Administrator. None could even look at BrookG directly, so brilliant was the light shining from his ethereal form and so great was the shame a violation of the Rules carried.
None save one.
GUAâs smile hadnât faded. He returned BrookGâs contemptuous gaze with a patronizing one, the same one might give to a child who had just beaten the Easy AI.
âThe Rules do not bind me, Brook. You can hope to defeat me no more than diarouga can hope to take a game off Kaiserklein - or me, for that matter. And if you will not step aside, then even the mighty Administrators shall learn the taste of defeat. Letâs go.â
âGiveUAnxiety...You came back,â Mitoe stammered, equal parts shocked and delighted.
âNo,â GUA replied, resting a hand on his old friendâs shoulder. âI never left.â
Osmane eyed the newcomer with suspicion. âThe Ninjas were never ones to be trusted. How do we know heâs not in league with NWC?â
minimoult added, âLetâs not forget wooklâs 1-4 loss to GUA. Even if he isnât an NWC spy, thereâs no doubt heâs been working with the Administrators.â
Osmane looked visibly confused at minimoultâs comment but nodded in agreement nonetheless.
âGUA saved the Mandarin Duck Squad before. In our darkest hour, it was he who kept us afloat during the First League. Without GUA, MDS would not be around. Letâs hear what he has to say,â duck said, lifting a wing to calm the raised voices.
GUA spoke next. âNot all of Japan is under the NWC AIâs control. From a hidden monastery, Aizamk and the other Nilla Ninjas have coordinated a resistance movement that threatens to undermine NWCâs grasp of the entire country. As for me, I have been sent to aid the MDS effort directly.â
âFinally, a real practice partner!â KINGofOsmane laughed.
âWell, itâs a good sentiment, but Iâve got bad news. I ran the numbers, and even with GUA helping Mitoe practice, given the short time until the next match, my analysis gives Mitoeâs expected result at 3-2, maybe 4-1 if we get lucky. Itâs still not going to be enough,â Callen said. Even as a hybrid of human and AI, the disappointment in Callenâs robotic voice was palpable.
âMaybe so,â GUA smiled. âBut Mitoe wonât need to play. Iâll defeat diarouga myself.â
No sooner had GUA finished speaking than alarms sounds blared throughout the team houshe.
âAlert,â Callen said. âAdministrators detected in the area. Enforcer BrookG seems to have detected GUAâs claim that he would play in Mitoeâs place. We have twelve seconds to evacuate.â
âI knew it!â minimoult yelled. âThis was a setup. GUA is working for the Admin-â
Before he could finish his sentence, the roof of the team houshe was ripped off, and everyone looked up to see BrookG, High Enforcer of the Administrators, levitating above them. BrookG needed no weapon save one - his Rule Book, the words from which his utterance could destroy the playoff dreams of any team. As he opened the Rule Book, it glowed a bright gold, as if aware of the valiant fury that it would soon unleash.
âMANDARIN DUCK SQUAD,â BrookG thundered, his voice carrying throughout every crevice of the ruins of Seoul. âYOU ARE FOUND TO BE IN VIOLATION OF RULE 48.52: ONLY THE CHAMPION OR PLAYERS DRAFTED BY YOUR TEAM THROUGH THE AUCTION OR APPROVED TRADES MAY PLAY FOR YOUR TEAM. YOU ARE ADDITIONALLY FOUND TO BE IN VIOLATION OF RULE 115.35: AFTER PAIRINGS ARE FINALIZED, YOU MAY NOT SUBSTITUTE PLAYERS. YOUR PUNISHMENT IS IMMEDIATE DISQUALIFICATION FROM THE LEAGUE. SURRENDER NOW, OR YOU WILL RECEIVE AN ADDITIONAL SIX MONTH BANâ
Players, managers, champions, and analysts alike quailed at the sight of the Administrator. None could even look at BrookG directly, so brilliant was the light shining from his ethereal form and so great was the shame a violation of the Rules carried.
None save one.
GUAâs smile hadnât faded. He returned BrookGâs contemptuous gaze with a patronizing one, the same one might give to a child who had just beaten the Easy AI.
âThe Rules do not bind me, Brook. You can hope to defeat me no more than diarouga can hope to take a game off Kaiserklein - or me, for that matter. And if you will not step aside, then even the mighty Administrators shall learn the taste of defeat. Letâs go.â
duck
imo
imo
Re: Duck Tales Pt. 1
2 parts and I'm addicted. Pressing F9 till I can devour the third part
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- Ninja
- Posts: 14364
- Joined: Mar 26, 2015
Re: Duck Tales Pt. 1
An inside look at the incredible devotion and player sacrifice it takes to be a playoff winning team
- Imperial Noob
- Lancer
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- Joined: Feb 29, 2016
- Location: Well hello DEre
Re: Duck Tales Pt. 1
Top 10 Anime BetrayalsVinyanyĂ©rĂ« wrote: âI knew it!â minimoult yelled. âThis was a setup. GUA is working for the Admin-â
- Vinyanyérë
- Retired Contributor
- Posts: 1839
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Re: Duck Tales Pt. 1
Another leaked message from the Mandarin Duck Squad Discord:
(part 3 coming soon)
(part 3 coming soon)
duck
imo
imo
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